It is actually normal to have appropriate possessiveness in love, because if there is no possessiveness between the two of you, the attraction between you will disappear and the love will be gone. So love and possessiveness actually coexist. So do you know the difference between true love and possessiveness? How to distinguish true love from possessiveness?
The difference between true love and possessiveness
If you are in true love, you will definitely be possessive and want to take the other person as your own, but there is still a big difference between the two. of.
1. Possessiveness is selfish, true love is selfless
Possessiveness is actually a kind of selfishness Behaviors such as not liking your partner’s contact with other members of the opposite sex and wanting to check in on others when your partner is not around are selfish behaviors in themselves. Many people actually hate their own possessiveness, but they can't control it. It feels like an endless cycle.
And true love is when you are willing to open your heart and show your inner self to the other person without any reservation or defense. For example, your weirdness, your dark side, your most vulnerable places, the knots in your heart, the things you are ashamed to say...
We all have secrets in life, and when we face them, we all have secrets. In this bizarre world, everyone has defenses, and everyone calculates gains and losses to some extent, even in relationships. True love makes you willing to let go of your defenses.
2. Possessiveness is a psychological problem, and true love is loving each other
Some people are so possessive in love that they are outrageous. For example: Girlfriend He wouldn't be happy if he said more than one word to another boy, let alone having his girlfriend eat with another boy. This possessiveness is actually due to psychological problems, firstly, lack of self-confidence, and secondly, insecurity. I am always afraid that my girlfriend will be attracted to another boy because that boy is better than me. Once I saw the so-called advantages in others, but ignored the essence of love.
Although two people who truly love each other have a certain degree of possessiveness, their possessiveness towards each other is controlled within a reasonable space. , will not make the other party uncomfortable. Two people care about each other, trust each other, and will not have conflicts because of their possessiveness.
3. Possessiveness will suppress you, but true love will make each other comfortable.
Excessive possessiveness will make the other person feel painful, but true love will make you feel inner peace. Possessiveness will find fault with, accuse, and dislike the other person, while true love will accept, tolerate, and pity the other person. Possessiveness seems to be love for the other person, but it is actually love for oneself, which is narrow, selfish and irrational. The knife of possessiveness hurts yourself first and then others. It is the number one killer of love. If you can clearly realize your possessiveness, be alert in time, and don't wait until the other person wants to leave before feeling regretful.
Summary: We can have a certain degree of possessiveness in love, but we must control the degree. When your possessiveness makes the other person feel uncomfortable, it will make the other person want to escape. Even if there is true love between you, possessiveness will also Separate you.
