A cold girl is like an iceberg. You want to chase her but don’t know how to get closer. Today I will tell you how to resonate with a cold girl and make her feel that you understand her.
1. Mobilize the other person's emotions
Emotional resonance is a good way to bring two people closer. It can help you better enter the other person's inner world.
The method of resonance, the formula can be summed up as "common experience + common feeling".
Resonance is divided into deep and shallow levels, and the degree depends entirely on the scarcity of experience and the uniqueness of feelings.
If we want to collide with common experiences, we can’t talk too much about men’s life patterns.
First take a look at the girl’s circle of friends, what are her usual hobbies, delineate the scope of entertainment activities, and first determine her rhythm of life.
Then you can talk to her normally about common spare time activities and experiences.
When we talk about feelings, when we face the topic, we try not to express rational feelings, but to express emotional aspects. Cognition.
For example, when we talk about buying a house, we talk about the market situation, or we analyze this matter seriously, it is difficult for girls to talk.
But if we talk about the hardships of working hard to earn money to buy a house, and talk about the pressure of heavy burdens in life, we can have a greater chance of emotional collision with girls.
If you want to express unique feelings, when facing an event, you should not comment on it, but share your emotions more.
For example, we and girls have all had the experience of "arguing and arguing with good friends around us and getting very angry".
If we comment at this time, the whole story is whether the other party is wrong, or he is taking the girl's side and saying bad things about her friends.
This actually does not show the uniqueness of the feeling. In fact, anyone around her can do it.
But if we can help her express the bitterness in her heart, like "I can understand your feelings when this happens. It feels very aggrieved, just like a friendship that cannot withstand the test of time and is betrayed." It feels the same" and so on.
Then, share with her a similar thing that we have encountered before.
This kind of emotional sharing can give girls a unique feeling, ensuring that while you have common feelings, you also have your own unique insights.
2. Learn to tell stories
For example, if you meet a girl to eat grilled fish together, you can Recalling a story about "My grandfather always took me to the river to fish when I was a child.".
For another example, if a girl asks you why you have a scar on your arm, you can share with her a childhood experience like "I fell when I was naughty as a child."
Of course, everyone’s childhood experience is different. For the sake of drama, artistic processing is allowed in the stories recalled, but in general, objective facts must be respected.
Another advantage of recalling childhood experiences is that it can activate the desire to talk "girls tell you".
It should be noted that we must be somewhat curious about her story.
If a girl is willing to share with you, she is all ears. If it is not convenient for a girl to talk more, it is best not to ask.
If you don’t have any childhood experiences that you can talk about, you can also share some stories about people around you with girls.
For example, your friends recently went on a self-driving trip somewhere, took a lot of photos, and tested the attitude of girls.
If a girl also likes to travel, she can make a vague invitation and agree to go out together when there is a chance in the future.
If the girl’s feedback is very average, which also shows that she doesn’t like going out much, we can avoid this topic next time.
In addition to talking about friends’ stories, you can also talk about their emotional states.
Okay, the above is a chat method to share with everyone, through emotional resonance, to get closer to a cold girl.
